40.5
I wrote a serialized memoir, here's what I learned
I’m forty and a half today, which seems the perfect time to publish this much-procrastinated “lessons learned” summary.
I wrote forty essays between April 2023 and April 2024, a project I initially called “40 Before 40” because I wanted to have all the pieces written before my 40th birthday in December 2023. I got sidetracked along the way, and I’m writing the “wrap-up” post two months after I finished the series, coincidence?
The Why
I consider myself an introspective person, and during my thirties, I realized that journaling helped me organize my thoughts. Writing helps me empty my head, and writing in a stream of consciousness has helped me work through different situations in my life.
I was new to Substack (in April 2023), and consistency was the number one piece of advice for those getting started. I also saw serialized works published in other newsletters. I wanted to be consistent in my writing and set a goal that seemed slightly outside my comfort zone, and forty essays in eight months felt challenging.
The only memoir I had read before was “What I Talk About When I Talk About Running” by Haruki Murakami, in which he discusses his running and writing disciplines. I also read some essays by David Sedaris, who draws from his personal experiences to craft great stories. Sedaris’ pieces got me thinking about the moments my life has felt like a movie and how I could turn those moments into stories I could share with you, the reader.
Finally, I wanted to develop my writing style and find my voice, if you will, and writing about what I know seemed the perfect place to start.
Stick–to–itiveness
Forty is a lot. Right now, I’m on issue 35 of Smorgasbord (the newslettery part of Peregrino), meaning I’ve been writing something weekly for almost nine months. I came up with Smorgasbord because, around October 2023, I realized I couldn’t keep up with the personal essays, so a (emotionally) lighter writing exercise with no set ending would be a better choice for where I want to take Peregrino. Or something.
I don’t know if you suffer from this, but I sometimes get bored and want to do the new shiny thing instead of following through and finishing what I started. I’m sure it’s just me. Exhibit A: Puros Cuentos, my fiction-only publication, has been gathering dust since the end of April.
By the time I turned 40, I had written 32 essays. That’s 80% completion if my math is correct. It would’ve been easy to throw my hands and say: “Well, I tried,” and abandon the project then and there. But I realized I had set an arbitrary end date, and guess what? Nobody came knocking at my door asking why I hadn’t finished writing 40 essays by the time I said I would be done.
But Walther, now the name doesn’t mean anything! I have learned to let this go and learn from the experience. The way I think about it is that “40 Before 40” is the name of the first draft. I want to go back and make some edits, group the essays by topic, and maybe make them into an ebook. The sky’s the limit.
The Process
I don’t try to write every day. Between my 9-to-5 and four kids at home, I have little to no brain power left most days. Instead, my wonderful wife would give me the gift of time and send me off on my merry way to my favorite coffee shop, where I would put on my noise-canceling headphones and write for a couple of hours straight.
Being well-rested and highly caffeinated worked best for my writing sessions. I also developed the habit of taking notes during the week for ideas of what to write on the weekend. I drank gallons of cold brew from Black Rock coffee while writing 40 Before 40. Black Rock, if you’re reading this, sponsor me.
A few times, I wrote while smoking a pipe during the “colder” months in Phoenix. But, as much as I talk about alcohol in this newsletter, my consumption of caffeine surpasses my imbibing in cocktails.
The Reception
My favorite 40 Before 40 moment was knowing that
would binge-read my essays while feeding his newborn baby so he wouldn’t fall asleep. I would see notifications at ungodly hours of the day for his likes and comments, which warmed my heart.Honestly, I was not expecting my most popular piece to be about Natural Family Planning, but I’m glad it happened. I’m ecstatic that Rites of Passage and Father Figures, and On Joy are the second and third most popular pieces in Peregrino’s young history. Being extremely vulnerable pays off, kids.
What’s Next?
As I mentioned above, Smorgasbord is going strong; get a glimpse into what I’m thinking about every Friday morning. Also, The Tortilla Stack (a spin-off of a 40 Before 40 essay) is in progress. If you like reading about food in a memoirish kind of way, then this is for you.
That’s what I have planned for now, but God only knows what will happen. For now, all I have left to say is thank you, the reader, for coming along for the ride.
God bless!
-W